The fog is lifting

< we have some magnificent fogs that have lasted half a day here in Bendigo. I guess this is rather relevant to what I am about to say. This picture was taken just outside my terrace.

Well, where do I start?

I havent always been the happiest person. Pretty much ever since I moved to Bendigo last year it was pretty hard for me. It was a big move, and not knowing where to go, who to turn to, what to do, I sunk into a bit of lonliness and saddness.

I tried out a few different churches, which didnt really didnt 'click'. I thought I was going to go to some kind of pentecostal, but after going to both Bendigo AOG and Victory, things still werent happening for me and suddenly I felt myself feeling lost. I even went to the baptist church for a while, but something there was still missing. I didnt feel a close sense of 'relationship' in the churches.

But I didnt realise the answer until earlier this year, and it has been sitting in front of me since the day I started uni, right there in Indonesian C.

I tried to get involved with CU and it just wasnt cutting it.

Over summer I tried to find my feet again in terms of relationship with God-wise, although I was in Pinnaroo, which made it a bit harder. This summer, despite my distance, I really got to know Steff just over msn alone.

Coming back to uni, and just hanging with my 'group' again, I have just really enjoyed the company. Steff had invited me numerous times to Short Street, but I was a bit scared at first. I went and I liked it.

Its now semester 2 of my second year here. Just last Thursday I was sitting in my lounge room, feeling 'emo', listening to Linkin Park and terrorising Ben. I put numb on repeat and just sang it and sang it because I felt in the mood. Now this friday gone, I just feel like Ive had, as much as this is a loaded word, breakthrough. I just feel, content with being in my room alone. I feel content with Bendigo. I feel really really happy with whats going on. And whats better, is Ive found someone who I consider to be my best friend (in a worldy sense). Instead of crying because Im upset or lonely, I want to cry all the time because I feel so happy right now, and how could I have a friend who appreciates me as much as Steff does. I didnt think it was actually possible.

I know that "highs" dont last forever. I dont want this to merely be a high. (Its not really a high, its more like just feeling happy). I just want to feel this content all the time.

Gah. I dont know where Im heading with this post, and its not really speaking what I want to say so I think I'll end it here. Point of the matter is. I feel so happy with whats going on in my life at the moment, and I thank God for it. The fog feels like it has lifted.