20/11/2006

It is exactly one year today since my Grandpa passed away.

I still miss him so much. To think that at his funeral, an exact week after, I would be flying to Indonesia in a years time. To think that I am nowhere near the person I was standing next to that grave as I am today. But the one thing that hasn't changed is how much I miss him, and am glad about so many good genes of him I have.

Sometimes, just the thought of him makes me smile - thinking, "he was a good chap"

2 weeks and counting.

This time, in two weeks, I'll be flying somewhere between Jakarta and Makassar. That's a tad overwhelming thought.

This morning I got myself out of bed after the crazy, tiring, night that was, last night at McDonalds. Yawning, I made my way over to a school to help kids4life out with a breakfast program.

After that had finished, a few of us were in the staff room cleaning up. I was telling two of the girls there about how I was going to Indonesia. I heard a voice from behind say, "where abouts are you going?" Sitting behind me was a man with white hair.

I ended up sitting with this guy for a good half an hour talking about my trip. He even went and got an atlas. He said he travels to Indonesia nearly every year, and spends a lot of time in Makassar. This put to rest a few small fears of mine.

He told me about the setting of towns like Makassar: very poor, a lot of poverty around, some heart breaking stuff.

The thing I think that scares me the most about going to Indonesia, is coming home!

I remember in 2005 coming home feeling so unbelievably depressed about our higher living standard, and I know that I will be seeing things to a greater degree of poverty there.

I am coming home 4 days before christmas. This in itself freaks me out. My family really pride themselves in what they get each other at times. Presents become a real stress of christmas. But I don't want to come back to such commercialism! Ack!

I'm also really afraid of coming home and not caring about the things and people I used to care about before I left. I think I just need to motivate myself to get some accountability when I get home. There is no doubt that I will be even more passionate about changing the world than I used to be!

There's no doubt that this will change my life - it may break me too!

I can't believe I'm living the dream! Something that has been on my heart for 5 years - I am finally living it! I am going to Indonesia!

It's a lot of things. It's exciting, scary, overwhelming, and just plain "AAGH!"

And I'm sure it's just the beginning :)

blog some more...

Most of you should know this already, as you should have got an email. If you didn't email, please talk to me, because I thought I had most of you on my contact list!

As of the 27th of November, through till the 21st of December, this blog will not be posted in. Instead, be directed over here.

Why not just post here you ask? Let me explain.

For one, I have forwarded my new blog to a lot of people, family members. The blog does not link to my profile or to my blog. I don't want that many people reading my blog, where people might become scared of my views or something. Link my parents to this blog? I don't think so!

The blog (as well as this one) is also unlisted on google for security reasons. That means no nasties can google me and find me and hunt me down or anything rediculous.

It's also easier than sending out bulk emails! Yay for blogs - the way of the future! Along with RSS, the way of the future. Thanks to Geoff (whom is the 'other half' of Bec) with this post, I've been converted to google reader - where hast thou been all my life??

So, lo and behold: TRAVELLING WITH SAMMY!

http://travel-with-sammy.blogspot.com

(in the meantime, please keep reading and commenting on this blog for the next 20 days :D)

overwhelmed?

So here I am sitting here and finally the reality hits me that there is only one day of this rediculous practicum to go. Part of me is joyous and can't wait until I'm free as of monday afternoon (exams - such a release!), but part of me feels a little sad.

Although I have spent a majority of this prac complaining, and hating every minute, I will actually miss it. It gets to this point of the prac where I begin to evaluate how I've been - I'm not exactly happy.

So after exams, I turn 21 and head over to Indonesia. And suddenly everything becomes overwhelming as I enter into my fourth year. Where have the years gone?

I have a few friends that are actually finishing their university degree this year. Imagine how overwhelmed they must feel.

Countdown...

So today it is exactly a month until I am off my P's again. How exciting it is to be counting down again, and I haven't even broken the law! That will mean I will be a fully licenced Victorian licence holder! And due to the harsh Victorian drivers laws, I should be able to do much more and have more freedom! I'll be able to teach L platers! The question though is, do I WANT to teach them?? :P

Funnily enough, I turn 21 on that same day.

I'm having a bit of trouble though, what should I do for my 21st? At the moment I'm thinking of having it in a park. My dillemma though is which day to have it on, because not every day suits people. Eep!

And in the topic of count downs.. It is one month and 6 days until I fly to Indonesia! I'm so scared and excited all at once! I'm so glad Steff is coming with me :)

[Image from: a Public Domain Image a Day]

the list

I found an interesting list when I was looking for a notebook this morning. It was written probably in 2001, when I would have been in year 9, when "career advice" is being fed down your throat.

"Careers"
Flight attendant
pilot
female priest
park ranger youth worker/councilor
photographer
website designer
worker for World Vision in East Timor
Carer
Air Force
Cartoonist/Animator
Horticulturalist
Assistant Nurse
Accountant
Own my own airline: "Sammy Airways"
Army
Chiropractor
Post Office worker
writer
a DJ
Tour Guide

Does anyone else find it interesting that with all this diversity of jobs, teacher was not on the list? One thing I guess is important to note was this list would have been made before I went to Indonesia.

Something else that struck me (I assume I did this in 2004 - year 12) is that I crossed out everything and wrote "whatever God wants me to do!"

Now this strikes me with a question: How much control do we really have over our career choice? I believe that while we are quite capable of making our choices (whether they be good or bad according to the driving motivation) God opens and closes doors of opportunities.

Thinking about my career so far, I watched God open doors I thought would be padlocked. He allowed me to move all the way to Bendigo, and get me into a course my enter simply didn't 'benchmark'. Then the opportunity to go to Indonesia came up. Wow. How did that happen?

When we commit our ways to God, He will "make the path straight". That is an actual surrendering of our lives and our ambitions. The thing with straight paths though, as simple as that sounds, once you get past the surrender, and have the straight path, there are still distractions, there can still be things in front of you that you need to face! But aha, never fear, God is here! (and so come forth the cheesiness)

The other day I went for a walk. It's like my house mate continuously tells me, "walking is good for the soul". I was in a bit of a dilemma. I had to make a choice about the Indonesia trip really fast. There were voices all around me, some concerned for me telling me to stay, some eagerly pulling me by my shirt pleading with me to come.

As I walked on that sunny day down Sommerville St, praying about this matter, I felt God placing on my heart something that happened when I went in 2002.

Last time I went, I didn't really want to go. But while I was over there, I was absolutely heartbroken with the poverty and crazy things I saw. I was hurting for a hurting nation.

While I was walking, I felt God kind of talking to me about the orphanage. (I was actually unsure at the time whether we were actually going to an orphanage or not. Later clarification with Steff assured me that, yes, we are going to an orphanage.) I felt like God was really just like, "I hate to break it to you, but this is gonna break your heart."

Often God can use heartbreak as a motivating force to change our world. This motivating heartbreak I felt back in 2002 will be renewed when I go Indonesia. Just seeing the way these people live, you think, "how am I so darn lucky?" It's a bit like this I suppose. It's exciting, but it's also very scary. (I want to be heartbroken and motivated over my homework hehe)

Indonesia isn't the only thing I have heartbreak for. I have a massive ache for the children in this country (well, ok, even the world) and the things they go through. The things I experience on pracs is often a driving force to do something big in my community!

Back on track (pardon the pun), straight may not always mean logical. Straight may cost you something. Straight often seems crooked (but just remember who has the Perception). Life isn't just a highway you can ride all night long, as Mr. Tom Petty says. Jesus said go through the Narrow gate.. Why would you go through a narrow gate when it seems logical to keep following through on the freeway?

Quite honestly, I think it's still early days in my 'career'.

Seek out God's Will, it's beyond your wildest dreams!

Professionalism

"I expect professionalism."

It's a phrase I often hear one of my science lecturers say. Usually it is because of the boys playing up up the back of the lecture theatre. It's fair enough he saying it, as it often seems that these people cant leave their year 9 musings behind them.

The lecturer then goes into a five minute schpeel about how we're teachers, and we're educating tomorrows adults. So passionate about this issue, he even brought in some research that teachers are in the top ten of most trusted 'professionals'.

... Would you trust me?

But then, according to the Adelaide Advertiser, teaching wasn't even on the 'top ten' list. Doctors being the most trusted.

Today I would like to talk to you about my experience at the doctors yesterday.

I couldnt even watch my favorite show, All Saints, at 3pm, as I sat there trembling at the thought of getting a typhoid injection. The thought of the possibility it not being the right one, that it hadn't spent enough time in the fridge, that I would react. All of these crazy possibilities.

Mez came and got me, and practically dragged me out of the house kicking and screaming.

We sat in the waiting room for a good half hour, Mez asking me all about my trip as she tried to ease my mind about the injection and the abusive type people who just entered the waiting room.

Finally when it was my turn, the doctor came and got me, we sat in his office, he asked questions, and then he led us to a room where the nurse was waiting for me. This is ultimately where I paniked.

The nurse then accused me of acting like a 2 year old. After the injection I felt queezy, lied on the bed and cried. I didnt know what was going on but I felt incredibly strange and scared! The nurse just left, the doctor came in, and put a peice of paper on my stomach, and walked away.

I felt so very uncared for (apart from Mez being there, asking me more random questions to ease my mind). Honestly, the second word of this clinic was 'care', but seriously it didn't feel like it. Oh how I regretted doing this! I knew I should have just waited to see Dr. Chan. He'd make sure I'm fine! He may be that little bit nuts, but he's a good nut.

After a few hours, I realised that although I acted like a complete child being scared of the needle, that nurse really shouldn't have said that. Like, I can get over it, but what about the people who have anxiety conditions? Isn't that a little... (dare I say it) unprofessional?

I almost called them to make a 'complaint'. Although Jesus did command us to turn the other cheek, He also told us we should tell people when they are in the wrong (learnt that one the hard way from Lara).

So today, I have one arm and one foot (after tearing a tissue). I can't drive Roy (without almost having an accident) which sucks, because I need to rely on people to drive me places.

So there's the story of my life!

getting a cold trying to find a doctor

"although I walk through the Valley of Death, I will fear no needle!"

- Joy

Today is the day watching All Saints is just 'too much'.

I have recently spent $109 dollars on a typhoid vaccine which will hopefully not make me as sick as last time I had it.

Everybody believes Bendigo is in a GP crisis. It takes about a week to get into my doctor (which is pretty good for Bendigo!), and I spent 6 hours in the Emergancy Department on the weekend. All I want is a simple injection, that basically I want over!

After being on two waiting lists yesterday, and not getting a call for either, I decided this morning to wake up at 6:30 am, and by 7 be sitting outside of primary care (after going for a coffee at maccas) and sitting there until the open at 8am. It's a very interesting place at that time of morning. Probably wouldnt want to be there alone after dark!

To pass the time, sitting on a pillow on the cement footpath, I took some pictures. At 7:30, (note, why was I there since 7am!?) more people came to queue up, so I decided to stop being a fool and put my camera away.

I noticed that while about the 5 of us stood there in silence, we all had the one eager thing on our mind: as soon as the door opened, get in and get an appointment.

It was also obvious that we all were thinking the same thing: Bendigo needs more doctors.

stabilo

We have an interesting maths class this semester.

I can't say it is the highlight of my week. We often get hand outs we don't use. My friend Steff can often be found colouring in a pattern on one of these odd handouts every monday before the lecture starts. If you're lucky, she'll also continue this throughout the week.

A quote from the girl herself, "it's the highlight of my week!"

*bada boom ching!!*

But as far as 'highlights' go, earlier this week, I did something very exciting. I walked into the travel agent, and put a deposit in on my airfare to Indonesia!

And as far as my travel buddy Steff goes, you can check out about what we're doing and where we're going here.

Yes, after a lot of question about my suitability to travel, I finally decided (along with persuasion from my parents) and declared that I am, on November 27, getting on that plane and going to Sulawesi! This is one of my biggest dreams, and quite honestly, when I came to this campus in 2005, I honestly hoped that an opportunity like this would come up.

God is a God beyond our wildest dreams. This is quite likely only the beginning of what he has in store for me.

So from here on, it is the process of fund raising for the trip, getting my act together, having some immunisations and what not.

Sometimes I'm just sitting there and will just randomly giggle, jiggle, or tap my fingers on the table in excitement! Can you tell, I'm super excited! eeeeeeeee!

creative prophesy?

So here I am, back on blogger. Yeah, I couldn't keep away.

For those who were wondering, the reason I closed it was in a late night discovery of a comment to one of my posts. This comment initiated that I had hurt somebody with one of my posts. That post is now deleted. If that person is reading this, please know that I am sorry, and I hope you can forgive me.

So happenings of late. Just a lot of uni basically. We have a big prac coming up, where I have to implement a science plan to 5/6's. Eep!

Yesterday was a rough day. Wasn't well, so I spent the day with my 'church family'. I was blessed to get into primary care to get a doctors certificate.

I went to a bible study, to listen to Travis Ripley (on a CD). But then I fell asleep. So I slept on a bean bag while the rest of the ladies listened to the good old american preacher. I kept waking up and thinking "agh! Where am I? Whose that american??"

Afterwards, when I finally woke up, 'Travis' had finished speaking, I just started drawing on a peice of scrap paper. I was thinking about Indonesia, so I drew some mountains and Volcano. I was asked if it was a 'prophetic picture' (of which I highly doubted).

But then, later that night, we were watching the TV when somebody pointed out (the TV was on mute) that there was a volcano errupting on tens news. I had a look and then noticed that the text at the bottom was in Indonesian. Four villages had been evacuated, it read.

Interesting, maybe it was prophetic.

This morning I found out that the volcanoe that errupted was Mt Soputan, which is on the island of Sulawesi: the same island I am going to at the end of the year... hmmm

neeee hehehehe!

I have been drinking green tea, and it has taken a fast paced Indonesian pop song to unleash a whole heap of excitement in me! I'm so excited, I'm going to Indonesia at the end of the year! Agggghhhh!!

Meanwhile, back at the ranch, mum is heading to Malaysia, and I'm going to see if she can get me Ungu, Peterpan and Sheila on 7's CDs!

Enjoy this song that has me so hyped up! I challenge you to sing along! Comment and tell me how you went! (Yes, I expect comments!)

Ungu - Berjanjilah

Berjanjilah kau setia bila kau jadi kekasihku lagi
Berjanjilah kau setia selama kau masih disisiku

Kau mungkin bukanlah sesuatu yang baru dalam hidupku
Dalam pencarian cintaku wujudkan mimpi-mimpiku

Karena dahulu engkau pernah menjadi kekasih hatiku
Perhiasan dalam mimpiku mewarnai seluruh hidupku

Reff:
Berjanjilah kau setia bila kau jadi kekasihku lagi
Berjanjilah kau setia bila kau masih mencintaku
Berjanjilah kau setia untuk menyayangi aku lagi
Berjanjilah kau setia selama kau masih disisiku

Semoga hasrat ini temani untuk slamanya
Semoga cinta ini akan slalu ada

Reff:
Berjanjilah kau setia bila kau jadi kekasihku lagi
Berjanjilah kau setia bila kau masih mencintaku
Berjanjilah kau setia untuk menyayangi aku lagi
Berjanjilah kau setia selama kau masih disisiku
Berjanjilah kau setia untuk menyayangi aku lagi
Berjanjilah kau setia selama kau masih disisiku

Berjanjilah berjanjilah

the power of one

Isn't it funny how one person, or even just a few, can make the difference to one country?

Imagine if I (or me and the people accompanying) could make that difference. A difference that could cancel out this terrorism - a difference for the better.

There were already travel warnings about Indonesia, but in the news yesterday, the warnings were emphasised that little bit more. Although as far as my understanding that the area I am travelling to is considered to be safe, somehow I find it unlikely that the university would risk taking us if there are warnings such as this going around. But you just never know.

It saddens me a lot that a few terrorists wreck so much for everyone.

I really need to seek God on this one. If I am to go, I'm sure he will give me a peace about it.

Not my will, but God's. God will make a way when there seems to be no way.

Kau hancurkan hatiku, hancurkan lagi
Kau hancurkan hatiku tuk melihatmu
Kau terangi jiwaku, kau redupkan lagi
Kau hancurkan hatiku tuk melihatmu

Ku katakan dengan indah - Peterpan (watch it Steff!)

(you break my heart, break it again, you break my heart to see me. You manifest my soul, you drain it again, you break my heart to see me. [I speak beautifully]) - how cheesy!!

Sulawesi now??

On the 24th of April, I blogged about a possible job opportunity in Bandung, Indonesia. I am blogging today to tell you... I haven't heard back from the lady, and it has been over a month.

But that's ok, because a very exciting opportunity came up today.

A guy who used to be an Indonesian lecturer at uni (before I started, he now works with ressie services, and also happens to be a christian) turned up at our last Indonesian class for the semester today. He began to talk about a trip to Sulawesi, Indonesia the uni is running at the end of the year. After the bali bombings, and the various dramas following, trips to Indonesia were stopped by schools and universities. Until now, and I have the chance to be involved. The more he talked about it the more and more I wanted to go!

Some info

• 27 days from November 27 to December 23
• Spend time in the capital of Sulawesi: Kendari (pop about 200,000)
  
• Stay with lecturers or other families
• Attend Indonesian language and cultural classes
• Go on excursions and activities with Indonesian 'buddy'.
• Visit an Indonesian villiage 2 hours from the capital, called Lambuya.
• Stay with local villagers (sure.. 5 star accomodation!)
• Teach about Australian culture and english language at primary and secondary schools
• Helping villagers in rice fields (wahahahah! I love rice!)
• Identifying future community development possibilities
• Visiting a national park
• Go on a boat to a tropical island paradise
  
• snorkelling
• swimming
• a hotel!
• relaxing!

Agh! I so want to go. The experience would be rewarding, something I can put on my CV, an unforgettable experience!

There are barriers though, finances being one. But if God wants this, He will provide. Maybe I'll sell my car, or be a little more realistic and get a job.

Some people may get a little judgemental that I am not going with a christian organisation, as a 'missionary'. But I treat my whole life as a mission. The people I meet, the places I go. Even though 'officially' I am not on a 'mission', really, every day of my life, is a mission!

sangat miskin

This is what toilets look like in Indonesia. Speaking of toilets look at this!

Anyway, it is monday, and I was back at school, and very happy. Millions of voiced around me screaming "Miss Smedley! Miss Smedley! I need your help! MISS SMEDLEY!"

I didnt get to have lunch today, which really sucked. My cheap lunch from Not Quite Right was definately not quite right. It turned out to be out of date from March: I brought it last week! I wasn't up for making myself any sicker so I binned it. Too bad I didn't have breakfast (break the fast. It's a compound word. agh! I'm turning into a teacher!), and my recess consisted of a small bag of vege chips. Oh well, luckily I had a green tea bag in my bag. MMmm. Nice.

On that note, it sucks being broke. It equally sucks when you spend half an hour getting groceries you can't pay for because you dont have enough money in your account. It's ok. God provides. It was just frustrating, and a bit of a fright. One of those things I never thought would happen to me. But I think it taught me an important lesson of not to shop at coles. The whole time I was there I couldn't stop thinking about how expensive and how much variety it lacks.

In other news: Port Adelaide are on top of the ladder. That makes 5 people in the city of Bendigo very happy.

Today in the staff room they were saying about how gastro is going around. Please pray I don't get it!

The weekend: I spent it sleeping, coughing, cleaning, planning, churching, and chilling with Mez.

My fish is killing itself with stupidity, just like its late wife. The tank is looking in need of a clean. I'm going to get a pet snail, and call it Steff. Steff the snail. It's a good break from me being the snail, or a sea gull. grr.

Anyway, enough procrastinating, the world isn't going to change with me sitting here blogging (... or is it?)

peace out

sms pagi ini

"Hey how r u? Do u know any1 who mite be interested in teaching kindergarten kids in Bandung, Indo? Speaking in english of course. Visa& airfare paid for by kinder..."


AGh! Pick me!!!
OK, need to calm down, pray, pray, pray... Do my lit assignment, as well as the other two which await me.. Pray more!

... Oh my gosh, just I just got a number in Indonesia to sms about it!!!

mau mati hari ini?

Well, after I finished my last blog post, I decided it was time for lunch. I searched through what food we had, and what would take the least amount of cooking for the busy day in front of me. I found some frozen hash browns, and began to cook them on the George. Little did I know, the cord had become stuck between the plates.

While this was happening, I was still really frustrated about the fact that I really wanted soup, and couldn't find my can opener. I searched and searched through the drawers, and eventually found it with the small spoons in the top drawer. I was very happy, and opened the can, put the contents in the saucepan, and began to cook my soup.

Now by this time, the hashbrowns were almost cooked, so I put a bit of pressure on the george, when suddenly, BANG! This huge fireball emerges from the george. I immediately turned it off at the power point, freaked out, and got advice from Steff. It ended with me armed with two wooden spoons getting the plug out of the powerpoint. It's still sitting there with the hashbrowns still in it.

So that was a near death experience. I can't help but wonder what would have happened if the outcome was worse, how long it would take for someone to realise I'm not around.

I got this George for my mum for her birthday in 2005. She really liked it, however, was constantly frustrated because it was too small to cook her and Jess a decent meal. But she really liked the concept, so she went to the city and brought herself a BIGGER George, and gave me the small George. Being a uni student I happily took him in. There have been many fun days since then. We cooked steak together, we even cooked fritz together. There were many happy days of toasted sandwhiches and I even made Steff lunch on there once. Sigh.

So what will I do with George now? I think either a burial service in my back yard (lots of dirt and no garden), or maybe I could make him into an expressive form of abstract art?

Good bye George, I will miss you. Rest in peace.

In other news, I may be going back to Indonesia July this year!

mungkin nanti

This week I have discovered not only that I need to be more productive in the little time that I have, but also that I really enjoy Indonesian pop music. It makes me want to go back so much!!

This week I have listened to a song with the phrase 'pekat malam'.. Now I knew malam meant night, but I did not know what pekat malam meant. I knew it meant 'thick', but thick night!? So then after enquiring through my kamus (dictionary) and clarifying my Indonesian lecturer (native Indonesian lady). She looked at me confused as I asked her, paused for a moment, told me "a dark night", and asked why I asked such a question. The look on her face was gold.

So that was fun. If you want to hear some Indonesian pop music, go on myspace.com and music search for either peterpan or ungu.

hatiku percaya

(title is Indonesian for "my heart believes")

Over the course of the mission in Bendigo, I was constantly reminded about my desire to be a missionary in Indonesia.

Things were really confirmed for me on Sunday at church when my friend Zoe told me that she was serious about coming with me. She said that we probably couldn't do it this year, and I don't think that God is really calling me there yet, but I think that when He does, it may happen all very quickly. I have no time frame at the moment, but I know God does. Yagh! It freaks me out that there is a possibility that this is probably what God has in store for me, yet it is all exciting at the same time...

Before mission, I didn't want to go. I didn't want the stress, I didn't want to be tired, I didn't think I could do it, and I didn't think I could handle the heat... How ironic, hey? God put that all back to me and said that if I couldn't handle these things here in Bendigo, how on earth would I survive over in Indonesia?

For those who don't know.. I have actually been there before. I went back in 2002 with my school to places now you could only dream of going to (due to the danger). There was so much poverty. I grew up so much. I remember sitting on a bus, going through the city of Yogyakarta (yeah, no exotic trip to Bali), and watching all of the native Indonesians go about their business, and I thought to myself that God has made them, just like He has made me.. But nobody here knows Him. It broke my heart. My heart is absolutely broken for this country.

When I came back to Australia, my friend Kylie described me as a 'fly buzzing around in a jar'. I felt so depressed, and heartbroken about this country, about how they could not see the light of God..

For those who are statistically minded or want to know, Indonesia is made up of: Muslim 88%, Protestant 5%, Roman Catholic 3%, Hindu 2%, Buddhist 1%, other 1% (1998)

... Is this hope?

(youtube video)



The words to this song are
TUHANLAH KEKUATAN DAN MAZMURKU
DIA GUNUNG BATU DAN KES'LAMATANKU
HANYA PADA-MU HATIKU PERCAYA
KAULAH MENARA DAN KOTA PERLINDUNGAN

REFF :
KU MAU S'LALU BERSYUKUR
S'BAB CINTA-MU PADAKU
TAK KAN PERNAH BERUBAH
HATIKU PERCAYA

WALAU BUMI BERGUNCANG
GUNUNG-GUNUNG BERANJAK
NAMUN KASIH SETIA-MU
TAK PERGI DARIKU

I dare you to try and sing along! And for those who are not Steff (I expect you Steff to know all this... says the girl whose about to get their dictionary to translate this), the rough translation of this is:

God who is strong and my song
He is a strong mountain and my happiness
Only unto You my heart believes
You are a tower and a city of protection

I always want to thank God
Because my love is in You
It cannot be erased
My heart Believes

Even though the land may shake
Mountains move
Your love is always there
It won't leave from me

Does this look like an Indonesian Hillsong to anybody else? Me being against 'shiny christianity', this concerns me for some reason.. I'm guessing these guys would be in the city of Jakarta, but this isn't what Christianity is about? Worshipping God, yes, but it is really hard to imagine it is in Indonesia? After what I saw when I was there?

Bizarre...

Who I am.. Who I am not...

Today I have seen a few things worth blogging about.

This morning, at church (short street), a couple spoke about their recent missions trip to china. It was really touching some of the stuff they did. I would love to go over. There were so many things in what they were talking about which reminded me of Indonesia.

It is funny how I longed to go over to Asia to do what they were doing. I still do long for it. But how important is it to me? I know that part of this is why Im here in Bendigo. There is the smidget of opportunity to go over to China next year with them.

I was pondering this today. If this was what God wanted me to do, how willing would I be to go over there? Would I risk the safety, the distance from Hamish, my friends, my money, or even would I risk a semester of uni, meaning not being able to graduate with my friends? What would I sacrifice for God?

At the moment, short street don't have sunday night services in the school holidays. Cara invited me around to her house, and then after we were going to go to the AOG.

I was kind of excited about going to the AOG, seeing things that I wouldnt normally see at Short Street. And dont get me wrong, it was an exciting experience. I dont mind the fact that Short Street doesnt make a habit of that kind of stuff, in fact, Im really happy that my mind isnt consumed by all of this every weekend.

The sermon was pretty good, he had some really good things to say. Unfortunately I didnt take notes.